Monday, January 5, 2015

Secrets & Pigs

The boy terrorists hates naps and he hates going to bed (He still NEEDS naps though) .
He will find 15 million reasons to stay out of bed or get up out of bed to prolong this atrocious sentence imposed by the cruel dictators who run the house.

This usually involves asking to pee, getting water or needing to "tell you something".
The latter has been the most prevalent as of late.  We've begun to stop him at the stairs and make him tell us his news from the landing. (His bedroom is upstairs and the living room is downstairs.  He was able to turn that whole trip into a 15 minute excursion)
Boy terrorist
This kid is maddening, but I've got to hand it to him he's smart...he's changed his tactic.  Lately he comes down and tells one of us that he needs to tell us something "in our ear" before we can send him packing.

The husband and I  being as curious as we are fall for it every time.  (typically he just tells us he loves us or needs to pee.)
Usually this is just frustrating and we get fairly annoyed, but "the secret" last week still has us laughing.
I thought I'd share:

(As told to my by the hubby:)
I worked Friday of last week so D was home with the kids alone. He put them both to bed.  Girl terrorist was down for the count.  Boy terrorist had shared his 57 secrets and was assumed to be asleep.  D settled in and decided to play a little PlayStation (New Christmas Gift)
The game of choice was Grand Theft Auto.  A totally unsuitable game for kids - which is why he waited till the terrorists were asleep.  (The game in a nutshell - you steal cars, walk around and beat people up and do "missions".)

Anyway, in this particular instance Derek was running the player around the city and came across a pig.  He kicked the pig out of the way (IN THE GAME - he wouldn't kick a real pig)  and went on about the game.
A while into his game D hears the boy terrorist making noise at the top of the stairs and tells him to get back in bed.

Par for the course, Boy Terrorist needs to tell him something - "in his ear".
Derek pauses the game and tells him to come down and say what he needs to say.  (Fully expecting "I love you" or "I need to pee")
Instead, Boy Terrorist leans in and says "Daddy, don't kick pigs".
With that he walked away and went to bed...

I don't know if it's the unexpected or if we're just a little nuts, but we haven't been able to stop laughing about it all weekend.
D will lean over to me and whisper "Don't kick pigs" and I die laughing.
I think we have issues...

The end.
This is what we resort to when he wont sleep...